The Laurel Experience

So Rio and I decided to rent this townhouse with our boy Flanagan and this other guy that I'm pretty sure this guy was dropped on his head several times as a baby. All I can say is, that cat was really socially and mentally challenge but he was a friend of Rio and Flanagan.

You know four guys living in a house always equal to trouble. We all were 22, I still was somewhat very quiet but we decided to throw our first party or let's call it a social gathering. This is when I really met the other members of the 100 miles clique, Turbo the ultimate hype-man, Dill and Bolo (the big ass weightlifting dude). 100 miles is still a later chapter but the theme behind the gathering was suppose to be all about the 70's. Actually, one of the roommates had a circular shaped bed. That thing was sweet. All he needed was the bed to rotate, some heart shape pillows to complete the look and maybe throw in some leopard sheets. 

Well, I was talked into wearing a diaper like the guy from Parliament-Funkadelic and I went along with

it. It was a setup, none of the roommates dressed up, well Rio did but he changed back into regular clothes. Therefore, I was left standing in the middle of the party in a sheet wrapped around my ass like a diaper. That wasn't cool but I did it. Lucky it didn't make me a emotional wreck and no pictures ever surfaced. 

The party turned out to be a small success. I'm putting extra emphasis on small. Party number two, was very different, a lot more people but started slow like a 8th grade dance until Rio turned on the lights and I quote "I thought y'all came to party, here's what we are going to do, everyone is gonna go outside and walk back in, the lights will go back off  and you better party your asses off". Needless to say that we almost the blew the roof off that mutha f**** and the last person to leave was trying to beat the sun home. 

I know, I know, still sounds a little tame but number three. Listen, party number tres (3 in spanish). After, we discovered our underage neighbor and her passed out in one of the rooms. She will be included in a few other stories as we known her for years and still is a close friend. We just had to make sure that she was safe. Things went to the next level, there were more titties exposed that night while people were dancing than a Saturday night at the Stadium club. We should have charged a $20 cover and a two drink minimum. Rent would have been paid for at least a month.  

The grand finale, party number four. We are not sure if the word got out about the boobies at the last one or just our parties were good. Number four, the Fire Marshall could have shutdown. We probably had well over 100 pass through that small townhouse and most of the people we never seen before or knew who invited them. It was Project X without the Hollywood fluff added. We had told the neighbor that we were having another party and let us know if things we're too loud. Being a jerk, he came over and I could see if he complained about too many people standing outside with red cups. We all know about the red cups. This clown said to us that the music was giving his kids nightmares. You could barely hear the music because we had it turned down so people could talk. After that the music got cranked up probably to the not most respectable level.  

We all know that good parties ends up with the cops. They showed up but nothing was extreme and they did not knock on the door because they didn't have a purpose too. These pricks still ended ticketing 20 of our guest cars, those parking violations were so bogus. As the party started to end, I remember stepping over people knocked on the floor, the same song was on repeat as begin to clean up the bottles. Such a great party but downside was, we had to use the fireplace for 2/3 of that winter to keep the house warm since someone was grinding up against the wall and broke our thermostat. 

Juan Carlos 

The Beginning - Chapter 1

To protect some of people that are apart of the chronicles I am using nicknames and alias. I will also not talk about the women that have dated. I think that most of them were bat shit crazy and that's my fault for dating their crazy asses from the start.

I'm writing this blog to talk about my journeys and the stories that are associated with them. My boys, the 100 Miles crew (I will explain the premise behind that name in another chapter) are always reflecting on the crazy stuff that we have done and I always said that it would be good reading material to write this stuff down therefore I'm telling my story. So just think of Morgan Freeman voice as you read as if he is narrating my stories. He narrates everything else, so why not my ish. Here just a snippet of what this is all about, I have accidentally walked into a gay club in New Orleans during Mardi Gras and did not realize it for several minutes, I almost got shot and a witch cursed the four of us in North Carolina and that is just the mild stuff. I will try post stuff in chronological order as much as possible but I do hang with these new group of guys now which we cause a lot of trouble too. Let's just call them old dude, lil dude and Cage for future reference. If something really interesting happens, I will fill the need to let the nation know about it. I just hope you guys enjoy and continue to follow the chapters as they unfold.

Before I really start, I wonder if YouTube, camera phones and social media were around when we first started, would be filthy rich now or serving 5 to 10 in the big house because all of the debauchery and mayhem that we have cause. Come to think about it, the many violations that we have committed, we would be out now on good behavior.


Should I say the beginning or really the end? The chronicles actually did not start in Vegas. I remember as if it was yesterday, I was a shy and an innocent kid, look at that picture. I was so quiet, not ounce of alcohol ever pierced my body while I was in high school and if a girl would look in my direction, I could probably beat Jesse Owens in a foot race to run and get away from her.

Then I went off to college and met a good friend of mine, let's call him Rio. Let's just say the shit hit the fan and I went from the shy kid up above to this and that in below pictures. Those pictures are from Mrytle Beach, another day, another story. Well, I was still shy but not as bad as high school. College years were still pretty conservative I use to tipsy off on Boone's Farm. That's really bad when all of the women could out drank me into curling up in a corner. I think the complete 180 took place when we moved into the townhouse in Laurel, MD but I want to say really before that. My junior year, it was one of our friend's birthday, we had Mickey 32oz, a case of them. Don't judge us, we were poor college kids back then. Anyway, I went to the campus to drop something off and when I got back, this dude Rio said take a couple swings of this. It was soco, Southern Comfort for the kids who don't know. I want to say one hour later, I was seeing funkadelic circles and stars.

As I look back, should I really blame this dude Rio or Mr. Hyde was just waiting to come out and needed that push. We left college and moved into a townhouse in Laurel MD; the house parties, traveling and the real drinking begun. Oh God, those Laurel house parties were classic, we had jean butt prints on the wall from people dancing, almost a county ordinance and probably broke so many fire codes violations. That's a good topic for my next post. Well I hope you enjoyed the beginning.

Juan Carlos